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  • Works of HeART Project

Bonnie's Story

Updated: Nov 18, 2019

My daughter and I were sitting at Browns restaurant when the call came. It was my oldest son and, by the sound of his voice, I thought something had happened to one of his sons. It had, but not what any of us would have imagined. He was 26 and had informed his dad that he wanted to change his gender. Apparently, he had been dealing with feeling like a girl since puberty. We all love him and support was never a question, but it was hard to accept his decision to change gender. So, my son, who rides a Harley Davidson and is a pretty tough guy, realized he needed outside support group sessions to help him understand what his son was going through. One counsellor said, “Imagine looking down at your body and feeling as though nothing belongs.”


The hardest part for me was ‘losing’ my grandson, as I had known him since birth. It was a real grieving process. The acceptance of the new name and appearance was not as difficult, because underneath she was the same good person. Her younger brother was fantastic with his understanding and support, as well as a great example.


She is now counselling young people who are also dealing with transgender issues. Unfortunately, many families totally reject their children in this situation, so they have to deal with that loss, as well as the ridicule and bullying from others, resulting in a very high suicide rate. Unconditional love and acceptance go a long way to help the healing process.